Jamielynne (irishbubbles) wrote,

really upset

I'm writing this not in the hopes that your going to see this, but if you ever stumble on this just note this is for you. I'm hurt by the attitude you thre my way stating that I gave you an attitude. Sorry I even said anything to you in regards to sex. I'll be quite honest here "sex" isn't on the top of my list like it used to be. Sorry again that I am exhausted after work, picking up our child and then going back out to pick us up dinner again I'm sorry. Sorry if you took my sudden stop touching me as a nasty comment however you just never quit and again it makes me feel like shit if I reject your oh so OBVIOUS hints at wanting to have some kind of foreplay all the time. Again I do have other things on my mind at the end of the day but I don't try to say much or talk much bc I know you never want to LISTEN. You only hear me when you want to hear me. We don't have many heart to hearts which is pathetic seeing that we are supposed to "be made for each other" bs. But let's cut to the chase when you said that you should go look for someone else to satisfy your, your unsatisfiarble sexual appetite, it cut to the core basically to every nerve ending on my body to feel pain again. Just when I thought I could let the walls down again here you go starting with something so fucking hurtful bc I again "refused" to satisfy you in some sort of way... I'm left to say WTF and to ponder most of the night while your laying here in bed snoring your ass off. How fair is that to me?? Your so unapologetic and so selfish. I feel like you only think about yourself at times, and if you think I'm pointing the finger at solely you then thanks for assuming. You take me for granted at times and you try to rule with an iron fist which is bullshit. I'm sick of it I'm sick of being treated like I'm a child n not your spouse, funny thing is if I were to switch the tables you wouldnt be a happy camper would you? No your quick move is to throw me and your kid out on the streets which really goes to show what kind of person you are but let's face it why in gods creation would I feel you were any different from anyone else, seems like in the end I'm always the one ending up hurt with a fucking broken heart. It was so different in the beginning bc I think it was something new and something exciting.. Throw a kid in the mix and see how quickly our feelings change. I feel like the life you wanted and what the real picture is are 2 different things. I just want someone with the same family outlook like I have and not feel like I'm a pain in the ass bc I want to do something as a family. Just really hurt.. Pissed off and if finding someone else makes you happy then so be it bc I'll bow out gracefully and let you lead the life you want. Just don't forget about your son bc every little kid needs both parents in their life just never thought we'd end up like your parents.....
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